I’ve Tried Therapy and it Doesn’t Work

So you’ve been to therapy and it feels like it is not helpful! Finding the right therapist can take time. Just like going to a doctor, therapist all have specialties. When searching for a doctor, you look for those that will meet your needs. They may have a specialty or a background that aligns with things you value. The same is true when finding a therapist. Therapists have specific modalities or styles based on their experience or training. It is important to find a therapist that aligns with your values and specializes in areas of interest; such as, addiction, marital, depression, trauma, or parenting. 

When looking for atherapist it is important to do your research. A therapist may put on theirprofile “Couples Therapist”, “EMDR Certified”, or “Children Specialist” whenthey may not have in depth training or experience in those. It is notinappropriate or unprofessional to see if the therapist offers a face-to-faceor over the phone consult so you can gain some insight to their experience andspecialty. 

Even more important thanfinding a therapist that specializes in your area of interest and need isfinding a therapist with a good fit for you and your personality. This is knownas the “therapeutic relationship” or “client-therapist fit”. Short version ofthe fancy term is that you need to be able to relate or connect with yourtherapist. This relationship is one of the primary factors that promotes changein therapy alongside with the therapist specialty. If you feel understood byyour therapist then it is easier to build a relationship of trust which helpspromote change. 

The search for the righttherapist can take some time, but it is well worth the effort! Sometimes askingfriends or family for referrals can help you narrow your search. When you finda therapist give it three to five sessions prior to determining whether the fitis right. If you feel like you cannot relate by then see if they can help youfind a better fit as they may have some other referrals that can meet yourneeds.

Lastly, you can wait toolong to go to therapy! Just as you would not put off going to the doctor for amedical emergency you should not put off prioritizing your relationship ormental health. 

If you wait too long, especially in a marriage, therapy change can take quite some time. Marriage therapists are not miracle workers and cannot fix things immediately. Therapy is not a quick fix for patterns that have taken months or years to develop.  Therapy is a wonderful way to improve your relationships, understand yourself, or improve your mental well-being, especially when you find a therapist who is a good fit. If you have tried therapy in the past and felt like it has not worked, reconsider trying therapy again. Keeping in mind that it can sometimes take time to find the right therapist for you. Wasatch Family Therapy has a dedicated and experienced team to help find the right fit for you.