The Magic of Therapy
When it comes to therapy, we’ve heard these questions asked multiple times. “Who needs therapy?” “Do I need therapy?” “How do I find the right therapist?” “How does therapy help?” Keep reading to learn who we think needs therapy and why the relationship between the therapist and client is beneficial.
Why Therapy and Therapists Help
When it comes to improving your mental health, personal relationships, or personal development, you have a lot of options. There are self-help books, medications, pod-casts, talking to a friend or family member, and more. Skills can be learned from self-help books or podcasts. Insight can be gained from talking to a friend or family member. Finally, medication has a good chance of impacting how you feel. With so many other, and potentially cheaper, options why do people continue to choose therapy?
It has been said that “if a flower doesn’t bloom, you fix the environment in which it grows, not the flower” - Alexander Den Heijer. In therapy, we are trying to create this ideal environment for healing and growth via The Therapeutic Relationship. (AKA: The Therapeutic Alliance or Working Alliance)
This is the magic of therapy. . . The relationship that you have in therapy can’t be duplicated by any podcast, self-help book, prescription, or even artificial intelligence. (Whew! job security for me!)
The Importance of a Good Therapeutic Relationship
Think about it this way. . . Where else in your life are you able to have a relationship with someone that. . .
Is focused on working together to build you up?
Who cares about you, but has no personal stakes in your life?
Is not impacted by your personal choices?
Accepts you and generally holds you in positive regard?
Strives to create an environment of safety, trust, and respect?
Is prepared with a menagerie of skills, tools, and information to be a valuable resource to you?
Is skilled at relationships and handling difficult situations?
It is pretty rare to have a relationship like that, and very beneficial. In fact, having a positive relationship with your therapist has been shown to be more indicative of positive therapy outcomes than the type of therapy that was done or the length of treatment (Horvath, & Symonds, 1991).
I tell clients, friends, family, and anyone who will listen, that EVERYONE can benefit from therapy. Having a person with whom you feel seen, heard, accepted, and helped is invaluable. In fact, therapists often go see other therapists because they see the value in having this type of relationship in their life. These therapists already have a ton of skills, tools, and resources at their disposal, yet they still see the value in therapy.
How to Tell if Your Therapist Is the Right Fit
Now that we know how important a good therapeutic relationship is, let’s go over how to know whether or not you have one. Unfortunately, not all therapists will be a good fit for you, but it should be pretty easy to tell. If you have been going to therapy, you should have a good idea of whether or not you have a good therapeutic relationship by the end of the 3rd or 4th session. By this time, you should feel heard, respected, cared for, and safe with your therapist. Finally, you should also feel that the therapist is able to appropriately challenge you, just enough to help you grow. If you are not feeling these things after the 3rd or 4th session, DON'T GIVE UP ON THERAPY! This simply means that it isn’t a good fit and time to try another therapist.
If you are looking for a therapist, we have immediate openings at all of our locations. Request an appointment by clicking here, calling 801.944.4555 or by texting 801.944.4555.
