Why is Faith Transition so Hard?
Faith transition is a complex process. Sometimes clients attempt to minimize their experience or feel they are not managing the transition well. The reality is this process is very difficult and can be overwhelming and disorienting. One explanation for the difficulty can be explored using Vanderweele’s model of “The 5 Domains of Life” (2017). Vanderweele’s model identifies the domains as follows: spirituality, family, work, health, and community. There are countless ways each domain is affected during faith transition. This is not comprehensive, but hopefully, if you have experienced any of these situations you will feel understood and will be more understanding of others who are struggling.
It’s obvious that spirituality would be challenged during a faith transition. Beliefs taught in religion are often inextricably tied to spirituality. During faith transition, some individuals will lose hope in the metaphysical. They may struggle to connect with a previous source of peace, their higher power. They may feel an overwhelming sense of cognitive dissonance, wanting to believe and no longer knowing who or what to believe in. They may struggle to trust themselves and the authorities upon whom they previously relied.
Faith transition is extremely stressful for many in the domain of family. Many families feel deeply connected through their religious affiliation, shared traditions, and rituals. Some families struggle to remain inclusive with those who are not adhering to religious mandates. Many families become fearful of a loved one leaving the religion so they double down on efforts to ensure conversion and retention. When this happens, clients report feeling further alienated and afraid. Many clients report worrying deeply about how they may be rejected by their families. They resist expressing their unresolved explorations and ongoing concerns due to fear of opposition, pressure, and intolerance.
Loss of belief in an eternal family is another profound fear. For many, religion proffered them hope to remain intact as a family in this life and the next life. It is deeply painful for those who lose grasp of this hope. Family also feels unstable and uncertain for those in mixed-faith marriages. When one member of the couple loses their faith and the other holds fast to the religion, there is a risk that the marriage will become contentious, and clients worry about future marital disintegration.
Presently many people express cognitive dissonance related to loved family members who identify as LGBTQ+ and how to manage discrimination in their religious community. Some clients report that they have withdrawn from religious practice until their loved ones are able to participate fully.
Work is perhaps a less obvious domain wherein faith transition can feel risky and potentially harmful. Some clients are employed or partnered in business with religious people. They worry about employment instability if their religious beliefs change and are no longer aligned with employers or partners. Other clients work in family businesses and fear rejection. In Utah, many people work for the church and worry about maintaining their employment.
Work also encompasses volunteer work. Many clients express a sense of loss and frustration without the opportunity to serve in religious capacities. Others struggle with memories of how they served in the church and the mistakes they may have made in those roles.
The domain of health is impacted by the anxiety and depression often experienced by those who are transitioning in their faith. Isolation and alienation are common and clients report feeling deeply lost and alone; some at levels that meet the criteria for a mental health diagnosis.
Physical health may be altered in conjunction with a mental health diagnosis. When people are depressed and/or anxious they tend to neglect their routines of self-care, including forgetting to take medication as prescribed, not getting sufficient sleep, eating poorly, and stopping exercise. Physical health may also be impacted due to a lack of resources outside of the church, including financial resources that are only available through religious affiliations.
Lastly, a sense of community through religious practice can be a reassuring space. Losing this community and feeling of belonging can feel scary and lonely. Learning how to create a new community is daunting for most adults, especially in a predominately religious community. Many clients also express extreme distress over how their children will be accepted and treated without religious involvement.
There are a multitude of ways faith transition impacts lives. Please know there is hope and help. Finding a place to explore faith concerns, process complex emotions, and move through fearful situations, including practicing navigating difficult conversations. is beneficial. There are online platforms and resources to navigate faith crisis/transition. Wasatch Family Therapy offers individual therapy and group therapy to help those who are navigating the complexities of this process. Please reach out for support.
To schedule with a therapist to work through a faith transition, call us at 801.944.4555 or schedule here! Jenny Hallisey, LCSW is also running a faith transitions group in our Farmington Office. To learn more about the group, click here.
References
Latif, S. (2021). What Are Life Domains & How Can We Balance Them? PositivePsychology.com. https://positivepsychology.com/what-are-life-domains/#hero-single.
Vanderweele, T. J. (2017). On the promotion of human flourishing. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, 114(31), 8148–8156.
