We constantly hear how important expectations are in relationships. However, many expectations in relationships are not discovered until they are NOT met by your partner. When this happens suddenly expectations become a big deal and have the potential to become a wedge in any relationship.
It can be difficult to acknowledge, monitor and understand some expectations you may have, because they are developed and picked up throughout life. We can unintentionally create expectations as a result of watching our parents’ behavior with each other. Or, expectations can be created from experiences in past relationships. Finally, media has a strong influence on expectations, as well as, what we are told by others (friends and family).
For example, you may have the expectation that your spouse will immediately come to you and try to work out a disagreement because you saw this behavior in your own parents. If you become involved with a person who does not do this, but withdraws for a few minutes to calm down after a disagreement, your expectation could be unfulfilled and it could leave you feeling like your relationship has some major flaw.More