We live in a world where we are being fed a constant stream of information at, seemingly, every turn. It can be easy to get lost in all the noise, and disconnect from our core sense of self, worth, and values. When that happens, one might experience depression, anxiety, feeling untethered, resentment, and unhealthy relationships, among others. One of my greatest steps in my own journey was learning how to come out of the self-betrayal that had become familiar and comfortable.
What is self betrayal? Self betrayal can manifest in many different ways. It can be sacrificing your own values and boundaries to maintain a relationship, saying “yes” when you actually want to say “no,” people pleasing, perfectionist tendencies in an effort to feel, or be seen as, “enough,” or living in a cycle of shame from not understanding the wounds that drive behavior. In a sense, it is disconnecting from that voice of truth within.
Learning to connect to your most authentic self can be scary and liberating, all in the same breath. Some tools to help you connect to this authentic self can be:
-Meditation and mindfulness exercises -Truth and distortion journaling prompts -Future self authoring exercises -EMDR, and other somatic work to process past trauma -Inner child work and attachment healing
As you learn to connect and find belonging to your truest self, you will find deeper and more meaningful connections in your relationships, as they are no longer responsible for filling your cup of worth. If you have experienced self betrayal in your life, and are wanting to find healing, know that you have all the tools of healing within you to begin this journey. An experienced counselor can help you unlock those tools when you find yourself feeling stuck.
In KIDS group participants learn how to make and keep friends. Sometimes it’s the negative behaviors that make a bad first impression or push friends away. These behaviors can be on purpose, accidental or driven by a desperate need to be accepted. The group members came up with these 20 ways to lose a friend. If your child struggles with friendship issues, challenge them to do identify a behavior and work on decreasing it.
Annoying behavior- not stopping when asked
Trying to be friends with the wrong person (someone who is consistently mean)
Being physically aggressive
Being too hyper
Inappropriate talk (swearing/potty talk)
Being a know it all
Invading personal space
Trying too hard (people pleasing)
Not being yourself: (pretending to be like them to be accepted).
Antagonizing: Pushing people’s buttons on purpose
Only talking about yourself
One uping/ Bragging
Getting jealous when they play with someone else
Not taking care of yourself: (baths, brushing teeth, clean clothing, etc).
This summer KIDS group is teaming up with Mad Science to provide an innovative and hands on experience to learn social skills. Many kids excel in science because it is logical and predictable. Human behavior is much more complex. We will be using the laws of science to help explain social etiquette in a new and fun way. Click here for more information.
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